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Prose sample: The Serpent's Tail, a fanfic
GG: That confounded cat!
GG: There I was, baking.
GG: A shocker, I know, but try to rein in your astonishment.
GG: I'd set a blueberry pie to cool on the counter and had turned my back but for hardly a moment when I heard this terrific crash.
GG: It's stereotypical, of course. But when I turned, oven mitts at the ready for a good furball-swatting, what did I find but the fruit of my tender labors ON THE CEILING.
GG: On the CEILING!
GG: And the dratted feline was simply sitting on the kitchen stool, laving his furry, criminal paws as if he hadn't just transported hours of hard work several feet in the air!
GG: When I recovered myself enough to shout and try to catch him, he slipped away, as always.
GG: I don't know how he does it. The windows were closed, the doors shut. We haven't a pet door for him to sneak through. And our chimney's been blocked off for ages!
GG: But, oh, I'll get to the bottom of this.
GG: Ohhhhhh, will there be retribution. That silly creature won't know what hit it.
GG: (What hit it will have been a pie, just so you know. And the blow will be gentle, if mocking.)
GG: (You know I don't advocate cruelty to animals.)
GG: (But. Anyway!)
GG: >:B!
GG: That confounded cat!
GG: There I was, baking.
GG: A shocker, I know, but try to rein in your astonishment.
GG: I'd set a blueberry pie to cool on the counter and had turned my back but for hardly a moment when I heard this terrific crash.
GG: It's stereotypical, of course. But when I turned, oven mitts at the ready for a good furball-swatting, what did I find but the fruit of my tender labors ON THE CEILING.
GG: On the CEILING!
GG: And the dratted feline was simply sitting on the kitchen stool, laving his furry, criminal paws as if he hadn't just transported hours of hard work several feet in the air!
GG: When I recovered myself enough to shout and try to catch him, he slipped away, as always.
GG: I don't know how he does it. The windows were closed, the doors shut. We haven't a pet door for him to sneak through. And our chimney's been blocked off for ages!
GG: But, oh, I'll get to the bottom of this.
GG: Ohhhhhh, will there be retribution. That silly creature won't know what hit it.
GG: (What hit it will have been a pie, just so you know. And the blow will be gentle, if mocking.)
GG: (You know I don't advocate cruelty to animals.)
GG: (But. Anyway!)
GG: >:B!